Emotional intelligence simply means ability to understand our emotions and emotions of others. If you have ability to know your weaknesses and strengths, motivate someone and handle conflicts then you are an emotionally wise person.
A bureaucrat can be intelligent in his career but does that makes him/her patriotic, courageous and honest. The answer is 'NO'. Your academic records can never prove that you would have emotional intelligence.
There are many types of feelings in human beings like fear, anxiety, anger, love, hatred etc. Every feeling is important and one of the goals of life is to get balance on these feelings. You can learn to speak French, you can learn to read-write, you can learn to sing,dance or anything but you can not learn goodness from any college or tutorial. You have to learn goodness through yourself only. Outside stimuli can motivate you but can never teach you goodness.
According to a psychologist Daniel Goleman, " Emotional intelligence hinges on the link between sentiment, character and moral instincts."
We can understand the feelings of other people only when we will be open to our own feelings. Suppression of feelings does not solves anything. We should learn to put feelings forward in a right way. Remember, human beings are animals and like any other animal they are also needed to be trained.
Change 'lust' into love; Change 'aggressiveness' into assertiveness; Fear into courage; Sadness into happiness. We all need to learn this art of handling emotions. Being angry or sad are not sins but if you will not control them then they can hurt in many ways. Anyone can become angry or sad but we should show these feelings at right time, on right person, for right purpose and we should not cross the line of sensibility.
We need appropriate feelings in proportionate to the circumstances. Our mind releases different types of vibrations in every moment of life. The more gregarious we are the more we need to control the negative emotions else they will ruin our reputation.
Whenever you feel that any of your negative action arose due to negative feeling will hurt someone you love stop yourself, take a breath and see how can you display your emotion with less severity. It is better to feel and then think than to think and then feel that you have done wrong.
